Oh My!
by tinacreeper
Summary: Pairing: CT - Casey and Trevor. A very controversial(sp) courtroom. hehehe


**A/N:** for those who dont know, Trevor Langan is played by Peter Hermann who is Mariska Hargitay's husband.

**Oh My!**

Casey Novak stared up at the judge, slightly unsure.  
"Ms Novak?" Judge Petrovsky called. "While we're young."  
Slowly, Casey rose.  
Frank Joslo, today's defendant, despite common belief, was fighting an inner battle.  
For the average American, being on trial for murder and the threat of death row was enough to make any man talk. Joslo, however, had more pressing matters on his mind.  
Standing before him was Casey Novak. Dressed in a kilt that looked as though it had seen the lesser side of its years, and a purple corset, Casey wore an expression to sink a boat. The current emotion that was playing her face like a ginnuea pig playing the accordion, it seemed to Joslo that thinking does in fact, hurt.  
"Mr Jello," she began, receiving a few chuckles with this, "You would have the jury believe that the victim consented to intercourse, would i be correct with that evaluation?"  
"Objection! Badgering the witness!" Trevor Langan, ADA for the defence, stood, much like the way you'd expect a tall angry German too.  
Casey jumped in before Petrovsky could say gaggle of midgets.  
"I'll re-phrase that your honour! Mr Juggle, on said night, how long was it before you actually realised the victim, Kerry Winters, was not a man and in fact, a woman," Casey peered down at Joslo, "a _man_!"  
"What?" Joslo stammered.  
"You heard me Mr Jumpolia, what was the amount of time that had passed before you realised that Winters was not a man but a woman?"  
"I don- i don't know!"  
Trevor jumped up once more, "Your honour! Please! This is ridiculous! My client is clearly emotionally unstable to proceed with trial and I move for an immediate recess to..." he trailed off and fell into a daze as Casey walked past the defence to lean against her desk. It was like watching a polar-bear ice skating in the middle of the Pope's church. Wonderful, spectacular.  
Trevor was captivated by the sheer checkeredness of the kilt that was slowly riding up her slim body, threatening to reveal thigh and possibly more.  
Though the judge didn't see it, Casey winked at him before returning her attention back toward Petrovsky.  
"Counsellor?" Petrovsky bantered, frowning upon Trevor.  
"Yes... wait... what?" He fumbled, clearly still sucked in with Casey's fat within the tightness of the bright purple corset.  
Casey caught her eyes with his and lost herself in them.  
The two ADAs stared at each other for an age; neither caring about the fact a suspiciously jealous judge was growing increasingly impatient.  
Petrovsky 'doinked doinked' and was finally able to regain composure of the two wild flamingos.  
"_Counsellors!_ Please! Save the mills and boon for the station house! This is my courtroom and unless there's a gaggle of midgets, seventeen Mexican wrestlers and three barnyard animals, there will be no erotic love tales within my courtroom! Is that understood?"  
Casey looked up at her like a child trying to read the stock-market section of the newspaper.  
Trevor rose slowly and whispered in Casey's ear through the tense silence of the courtroom.  
"Don't worry Casey," his voice thick of German, "I'm confused too."  
The German accent was the final straw as it sent a shiver down Casey's spine. She ignored all the rules of engagement in a fair fight for justice, Turing around and pulling Trevor into a fierce kiss. As they paused only for breath, Trevor stole her eyes and melted her soul before pulling her into a kiss to make hers pale by comparison.  
Petrovsky 'doinked doinked' again, fury burning in her wild eyes.  
"THAT'S ENOUGH!" She shrieked, pulling a loaded gun from a cowboy-style holster that sat haphazardly upon her freakishly high waist.  
"I WILL NOT HAVE YOU MAKING A MOCKERY OF MY COURTROOM! CASEY! I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME!"  
Casey's stomach dropped three floors down and she pulled away from Trevor, who was foaming at the mouth slightly.  
"Judge! Please! Now is not the time for you infantile fantasies!" she hushed a whisper.  
"OH COME ON CASEY! EVERYONE KNOWS BY NOW! ESPECIALLY AFTER THE 'KATHY' INCIDENT!"  
Suddenly, the entire cast of Circ De Soleil came bounding into the courtroom. Doing a fabulous human-pyramid, which involved fly-swatting candles, they whisked Joslo off the stand and bounded out the room once more. Leaving everyone, Casey included, slightly confused.  
The only one not dazed by this sudden intrusion seemed to be Petrovsky, but she clearly was having a bad day.  
"Any last words Casey? Before I pull the trigger?" She spat.  
"Well this isn't exactly Emerald City is it?" Casey wondered. Petrovsky paused a moment to marvel at Casey's ability to, even in the most intense of moments, make a quick Wizard of Oz reference.  
"Goodbye, it was fun while it lasted." And as if in a badly filmed action movie, Trevor dove in front of the bullet.  
"SHIZA!" He shrieked, taking the full impact.  
"TREVOR!" Casey screamed, dropping to her knees beside the wounded ADA, ignoring the maniacal laughter from the judge.  
Casey was on the brink of tears when Trevor held her hand, taking his final breaths.  
"Casey," he whispered.  
"Yes, my love," she leaned in close to ensure she didn't miss a single word.  
"I... love... yo-" he paused, looking down at the wound Casey was pressing on.  
"Trevor!" Casey panicked. "TREVOR NO! DON'T LEAVE ME! COME BACK! TREVOR!"  
Trevor looked up at her and smiled, "I'm fine... either it's not blood or I'm one of those over-priced equal artificial sugar wrappings... I'm ok!"  
Casey heard his words, taking them in she began to experience first hand what no ADA ever should. "TREVOR! PLEASE! COME BACK TO THE LIGHT! WHY! WHY GOD WHY? WHY WOULD YOU TAKE HIM AWAY FROM ME! OHHHHHHHHHH NOOOO WOE IS ME!"  
"CASEY!" Trevor shouted, "It's OK! I'm here!"  
"LIFE IS NOT WORTH LIVING! OOHHHHHHHHH!" and with that she tore herself off the ground and ripped the gun from the still laughing Petrovsky. She never would have thought that she would be 'eating a gun', as it were.  
But sure enough, there was ADA Casey Novak, sitting at her desk, knife and fork in hand, ready to cut her main course.  
After several minutes of frustrated cutting, she realised that there was a quicker way to take ones life. She poised the gun in her mouth and pulled the trigger.  
A jet of liquid hit the back of Casey's throat like a horse jumping onto a golfer on the green.  
Casey hit the floor, slightly taken aback.  
She was confused, to say the least.  
A familiar taste reached her taste buds.  
Petrovsky's laughed had since died to tears and she reached under her desk and pulled on her cape.  
"I AM THE REFRESHMENT QUEEN!" She screeched (sp) before sprinting out of the courtroom, tripping over the German on her way.  
"Casey?" Trevor called cautiously.  
Casey looked at him, confusion dancing in her eyes.  
"It's coke..." She realised slowly, "the bullet was coke... THE GOD DAMN BULLET WAS COKE!" And with that she threw the gun into the rather shocked jury and stormed towards the exit, stopping only when she realised Trevor wasn't following her. Turning, posing rather provocatively, she demanded, "Come here Vaulfy!" And she stormed out of the courtroom, Trevor as her heels.  
The foreman of the jury sat stunned for a moment before proclaiming, "well... you don't see that every day…"  
The jure next to him laughed in disagreement, "Obviously you've never met Shermann Hermann," his fellow jurs looked at him curiously, "But that, is a whole other story."

End.


End file.
